Ordinary life...
by Little green
Summary: Just a stupid lil' story about Heero's everyday life! Pleez R&R and Heero fans... Forgive me! ;_;


Helloooo!!! Just a small pointlees, stupid story about Heero, cuz' I was bored and I can't find a good ending to the third chapter of my horror fic... ;_;   
So... Enjoy (If one can say that...) and Treize and I luv you all!! (Another sap' crisis...)   
  
  
  
  


Ordinary life...   
(A Heero's-everyday-life story)   
  
  
  
  


It was a bright sunny day at Dr J's Super-secret-underground lair, Heero's alarm clock exploded, indicating that he was time to wake up. Heero supressed a yawn (because yawning is very a serious weakness. Even if it's 5 in the morning.), sat up in his bed, which was composed of a steel board and a half-sheet, and made its way to the bathroom, going across the minefield. There he defused the bomb hidden in his Special-bitter toothpaste tube and proceeded to wash himself, destroying the piranhas and the sharks waiting for him under the (cold... No, icy.) shower. After having dried his hair with a hand-grenade, our friend Heero went to his closet, to choose his clothes. He opened it to reveal a infinite line of green tanktops, black spandex shorts and yellow sneakers. he eventually decided himself for yellow sneakers, a green tanktop and black spandex shorts.   


Finally dressed, and in a good mood, he went to the lab, where Dr J and the perfect ferret were waiting for him. Dr J took off his pink lacy apron and handed him the meal he had amorously cooked for his perfect soldier : A big glass of pills and dietetic milk, with a bowl of cod-lider gruel (For the vitamins) and a goody big needle of experimental green and pink liquids. Yum.   


After he was done with his food, Heero followed Dr J in the computer room, to discover his latest mission.   


_- - Message - -_   
Mr Yuy, we suspect OZ of having build a secret base under the cover of a civilian leisure zone. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to infiltrate the area # 491914525121144, spot any OZ guy and blow them up. As usual, if they catch you. . . Well. . . We dunno you and. . . Uh. . . GOOD LUCK!!   
_- - End message - -_   


* * *

  


At 10 precisely, Heero was in front of the big red and yellow front door. He looked down at his ferret, they were both ready to begin the infiltration. At 10h01, The door opened and the agents took a step warily towards it, only to be immediatly washed by a wave of squeaking children. They got up slowly, covered in tiny footprints and approached the entry.   


Heero stared 'friendly' at the the cashier. "Two tickets. Now."   


The cashier answered by a levelled stare of her own. "We don't accept that kind of pets in the park. Sorry." She said with a grin.   


Heero fumbled in his magic spandex short, produced a cross-bow and proceeded to terminate the offending employee. Then, he and his ferret went hiding in a nearby bush (How convenient for the plot, eh? Always have a bush...) and, two minutes later, they were back, glaring at another cashier.   


"Two tickets."   


"Your mommy never told you to say 'please'?" The cashier answer.   


_::Omae wa korosu::_ "..."   


"Uhm... The other ticket is for... for... Him...??" The cashier said, eyeing warily that weird and hairy little boy with a huge cap and sunglasses hidden under oversized clothes.   


"My brother." Heero said.   


"Is he sick or something?"   


"Leprosy." Heero explained, leaving with his tickets and his 'little bro'.   


The cashier paled. o.O; "W... Wait!"   


* * *

  


Minutes later, Heero and his ferret entered the park. They immediatly spotted an ennemy lunging towards them at full speed. But, fortunately, Heero's enhanced reflexes didn't betray him.   


"Hi kiiiiiidzzz!! D'ya want a ballooooonnn?? Welcom to Dis..."   


Heero pulled out his gun from his spandex space and shot the assailant with deadly accuracy. Two in the knees, three in the belly (Alway aim at the belly-button) and one between the eyes, just to be sure.   


They ran away as the Giant squirrel on rollerblades fall on the floor with an audible 'poof', they jumped in the first vehicle they managed to steal and escaped, rolling madly in a giant pink tea cup.   


They hid the teacup and resumed their search for other OZ guys, when suddenly, they spotted a scene that made Heero's spandex heart jump. There, right in front of him, a bunch of rotten play cards were molesting a stupid blonde in a frilly dress. Heero's instinct took over. He pulled out his pocket beam canon, a few guns, handing them to his ferret and lunged towards the bad guys with a feral scream.   


"RELEEEENAAAAAAAAAA!!!!"   


The battle was fierce, and unfortunatly, 'Relena' was beheaded during the fight. Heero stared at the battlefield for a while, with his 'girl-and-her-puppy' look, shrugged, and left. He stopped as something caught his attention. He had found their HQ! But how destroy such a fortress? Suddenly, a device in his spandex short bipped. Heero pulled out his sandwich-phone* and waited as a message was printed on the salad.   


- - Your contact is : Goofy -- G.O.O.F.Y - -   


Heero pulled at the antenna and dialed the base's number. "Mission acknowledged."   


He was unaware that a few people were pointing at him warily. 'Did you see that guy...? Yeah... He's talkin' to his sandwich... And the child... Did you see the child...??"   


* * *

  


_Nearby..._   


"Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!! Wheeeee!!! I want a big big ice cream... Chocolate, vanilla and strawberry! With peanut butter and caramael sauce too... And don't forget the marshmallows!! With it... I'll take a bag of coooooookiiiiiieeeeezzzzzz!! And also, one... Uh... No! Two bottle of teeeeeaaa!!! Oh!! And gimme the Aladdin plushy toooo!" A young, pacifist (and sugar high) voice squeaked.   


"Master Quatre... If you eat so much, your belly's going to hurt..." Rasheed sighed.   


"I'm a Gundam pilot!!" Quatre beamed, raising his head, with caused the ears of his -Goofy- cap to shake happily.   


"And?" Rasheed said, cocking a sceptical eyebrow.   
__ __

_Sweatdrop>_   
__

Quatre was on the verge of tears and was about to kill somebody or something in 'Zero-mode', when a bush tugged at his sleeve. He turned to see two bushes, a big one and a small one, with black sunglasses, and one of them wearing yellow sneakers.   


"Heero... Is it you?"   


"Shhh!! NO NAMES!!" The bush answered, and the smaller bush bit hard Quatre's rear to remind him this.   


"Aowch!! ...It hurts... _Sob_> My body... _Sniff_> ... And my soul!" Quatre started to weep and the bigger bush handed him a black handkerchief with guns printed on it.   


"Shut up! And wipe your nose... It's running in a disgusting manner... Really..." The big bush said.   


The smaller bush simply stuck out a tiny pink tongue at Quatre. "Spppprrrrfffftttt!!!"   


"He... He's... Heero!! Your f***ing furrball is insulting me!!! DIE!!" Quatre yelled, zero-ed and lunging at the ferret, who immediatly pulled out a gun.   


Quatre stopped and wept some more. After he was done, they (finally) prepared the battle plan.   


"Heero... Are you sure about this? ... I mean... Destroying the castle of the sleeping beauty..."   


"..."   


"I kinda... like her. She's... sweet."   


"..."   


"Heero?"   


"Omae wa korosu!"   


"Uh... Okay."   


* * *

  


The following morning...   


Heero opened the newspaper and showed it to his ferret, almost (We said ALMOST!) smiling. "Mission completed."   


**$1 ** **The colonies observer 12/19/AC195**   
**"News :You live through it, we live by it!"**

* * *

  
Disneyland : The Drama!!   
**Mickey's breeches are now red with blood!**

**Yesterday morning, a nuclear rocket has destroyed the Disneyland complex. The local officers think that the terrorists were actually aiming at the sleeping beauty castle. The Gundams are heavily suspected, along with a bush which seems to have attempted to kill Snow White and her dwarfs. Three dwarfs are currently at the Pity Hospital, in a critical state. The police invite any person would could identify the bush to call the following number : 01 43 46 00 54 **   


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


* * *

  
*This is the return of the antenna sandwich!!

That was stupid he? Oh well... it was just a short thing I had in mind, nothing to do with the horror fic, but I think writing moronic stuff helps me fight the writer's block! ^_^;   
R&R, pleeeeezzz!! _Big puppy eyes_>   
  
  
  
  
  
  



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